Weird title, right?
Well, stick with me, and it will all make sense.
It’s the twins’ 8th birthday today. We have enjoyed the reminders for the past month about this upcoming event, complete with a countdown on our chalkboard and subtraction done each day after the question every morning, “What’s the date?” Today has been a day of twins all day complete with cinnamon rolls, Barbies, Sharpies, Lyle, Lyle the Crocodile in the theater, and big hugs.
I took a walk after we got home from the movie thanks to a beautiful day and just had to reflect on the seeds that were planted in a garden we weren’t expecting to grow with these girls. I have shared with you before that we had a different picture of our life and family, but while these two blessings have made the path shift, I would not change the life I have now for any other.
The song “Tend” by Bethel Music is a new one, shared with me by my teenage girls. Its lyrics are poignant to me at this time because with all the activities and responsibilities and emotions and laundry that come with growing this family, I have had to truly guard our hearts not to rush through our season of life. As a goal setter and go-getter, I tend to want to push through and not necessarily sit and enjoy my life as it’s happening. However, having the twins made me sit out a spell professionally, regroup and refocus. It helped us tend to our faith garden and prioritize how we were raising our kids. Tending to my heart, my little girls have taught me how to let some things go to let others grow. I have enjoyed my big kids more watching their relationship grow with the little girls. I have seen the excitement of Christmas and fireworks and the first day of school over and over, but with the girls, we all watch them with wonder and delight.
“So be the gardener of my heart. Tend the soil of my soul. Break up the fallow ground, cut back the overgrown.
And I won’t shy away, I will let the branches fall. So what you want can stay. And what you love can grow.”
These words from this song are ones I can hardly listen to let alone type without tearing up.
You see, celebrating my twins’ birth isn’t just presents and cake for me. For me, their birth needed to happen to tend to my heart and ambition. I’m tired and our house is crazy and busy and loud, but my heart will never be the same. My soul has been tended and it came through the birth of these unexpected rays of sunshine.
Mary and Caroline,
I will never forget the day you were born and the days after. You were both so little, and there were TWO of you. I was worried how we would do this, how we would care for you. As you grew, your dad and I watched that we weren’t the only ones taking care of you. Your siblings were and are the best and most loving caregivers and role models to you.
What is so amazing is your relationship with each other. You two are the best for each other. Watching you two care for each other, share with each other, tend to each other’s hearts and watch out for each other is a journey in which I am happy to have a front row seat.
Girls, you are the light of our lives. We are so happy to celebrate you today and know that your hearts planted seeds in mine that I needed more than I ever could articulate.
I love you more every day, every year.
Love,
Mom